I've never seen Mario Bros. Call me that purist who refuses to watch the big budget adaptation of a beloved novel. Perhaps a live action Mario cartoon. But there's absolutely no place for a live version of the Mario characters. Can you imagine a human Grimace? Well I've known many people that could probably play a human Grimace but that's besides the point. Which brings me to my next question. Would you be horrified if a McDonald's character showed up in a Mario game? There would be no mention of McDonald's and it wouldn't be that little pedophile Ronald. Like Grimace or Hamburglar. Or even a Goomba or a Koopa dressed as one. I'm conflicted. On one hand I like crossover. If you can have Sonic in a game, why not Mayor McCheese? But on the other hand, I don't want to do anything that'll make McDonald's feel better about serving liquefied chicken that has been reshaped into a breast facsimile. And it seems like McDonald's is a little sick of its characters anyway. I don't think they even sell the cookies anymore. Perhaps the better question is should Nintendo take over McDonald's? No more Big Mac. It's Big Bowser. Nothing like some delicious Koopa meat to get me through the day.
Oh but I'm off subject. The point is that this is Goomba from the Super Mario movie.
I mean what the fuck is this? They couldn't try just a little bit harder? This is like expecting to hear Roberta Flack's "Feel Like Makin Love" and instead hearing Bad Company's "Feel Like Making Love." This is like hearing that Arrested Development is back on the air only to see a reunited Mr. Wendell Arrested Development bouncing around in all their Afrohippie glory. Sometimes it's important to get what you expect. And a live action Goomba? Nothing more important.
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